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Most infertility
specialist’s prescriptions leave a lot to be desired. Either the
medicines are expensive, the injections painful or the side effects
bothersome. However, there is one prescription in reproductive
medicine which is fun; free and can boost your chances of conceiving
considerably – and that is – Sex ! Few patients have received a
prescription which just says “ Sex “ on it, but there is no doubt that
having frequent sex is the simplest way of increasing your chances of
conceiving.
While it is true that
just frequent sex is not going to help some couples to conceive ( for
example, couples where the wife’s tubes are blocked or where the
husband’s sperm count is zero ), it is also equally true that there are
few couples who have “absolute sterility”. Many have multiple minor
problems, the cumulative effect of which is infertility. Let’s take a
couple with a common problem, such as a borderline low sperm count, or
irregular cycles, for example. It is possible that there a few
functional sperm in the semen sample; or that she occasionally does
ovulate. However, if they have sex infrequently, their chances of
getting pregnant are dismal, because the chances of the eggs and sperm
meeting are reduced even further.
Similarly, many studies
have shown that the chances of conceiving are maximal 6-12 months after
fertility enhancing surgery , such as surgery for correcting
endometriosis ; removal of adhesions ( adhesiolysis); or tubal repair
surgery ( tuboplasty). Couples who have sex frequently after this type
of surgery have a better chance of conceiving, because they are
maximizing the probability of the eggs and sperm meeting.
In fact, even after
treatments such as intrauterine insemination (IUI ) and in vitro
fertilization (IVF), sex has been shown to increase pregnancy rates. The
reasons include the fact that more sperm are being deposited; and that
chemicals called prostglandins in the semen may increase uterine
receptivity to the embryo.
Having sex not only
boosts your fertility, it also has a number of pleasant side effects as
well ! Both lovemaking and orgasm have been shown to boost
blood circulation, improve skin tone, release tension , relieve
arthritic pains and promote psychological health. While the
mechanisms for these benefits are still unclear, some are simply because
of the fact that active sex can involve a lot of muscular activity,
depending upon your agility and ability in bed ! Another reason could be
the release of chemicals called endorphins (the body's natural
painkillers) from the brain and increased levels of cortisol ( the
stress hormone) during orgasm.
Sex boosts your fitness quotient too. About 30 minutes of active sex
burns 45 calories and provides the equivalent of a good workout, which
means sexercising is a great way of keeping in shape ! The additional
bonus is that your partner too reaps the benefits, making sex a
two-for-the-price-of-one activity.
In a book called Sexual Healing, Dr. Paul Pearsall, Director of
Behavioral Medicine at Detroit's Beaumont Hospital, writes that the joys
and pleasures of sex may provide us with an "intimacy inoculation" that
actually protects us from disease. The science of psychoneuroimmunology
( mind-body medicine) shows that when we experience mutually caring
sexual intimacy, hormones such as neuropeptides and cortisol pour
through our body , and help promote health and healing.
So how do you keep the sexual energy alive ? The key
for achieving this is caring: thinking about it and working at it.
Don’t have sex just to have a baby – have sex to have fun – the baby can
be a pleasant side-effect ! Passionate, exciting love may "hit" out of
the blue, but it remains and repeats itself only if it is continually
nurtured and treated
as an honoured guest. Remember that the most important sexual organ is
not the penis or the clitoris-it's the brain. It is best to consider
sexuality as an integral part of life - a gift to be honoured and
enjoyed. The more you learn about this energy, the more of it you will
have and the more you practise it, the better you will get at
it. Today, many couples living in cities complain that they are too
"tired" to have sex. It is also true that sex is often the first
casualty
of the ever-increasing stress that we all experience in our fast-paced
lifestyles. But what is not known is that good sex is a great stress
buster. It can not only help you to cope better with stress, it also
increases the body's energy flows. If you find you are too tired to
have
sex at night, a simple solution is to have sex first thing in the
morning
and what helps here is that most men have an "early morning" erection
anyway.
The good news here is that you can learn to improve
your sexual energy. The logic behind this is simple -- the
secrets of tapping sexual energy have been an integral part of all
ancient cultures, including Chinese (Taoist medicine) and Indian.
Tantric sex allows one to unlock the powers of meditation, breathing
and massage to help celebrate and revitalise a person's love life. The
basic belief here is that the body has a number of chakras -- or energy
centres -- and Tantra teaches a person certain exercises, which help in
sharing this energy and opening the door to ecstasy. And though earlier
this knowledge was locked up in esoteric texts, it is now easily
accessible on many websites like
www.tantra.com.
The Kamasutra is an integral part of our heritage and from this treatise
of love we can learn to understand the physiology of yogic ejaculation
control, develop the ability to expand the experience of pleasure and
also experience the power of ritual for enhancing lovemaking.
You can learn more about the effect of infertility
on sexuality in the Chapter,
Sexuality and Infertility.
How to make sex fun
The best way to learn is by watching teenagers - or remembering your own
adolescent days, when you only had sex on your mind !
Think of new ways of seducing your wife - ask her for suggestions !
Spend some time and energy in planning sex - anticipation can heighten
desire !
Set a 'date' for sex. Modern lifestyles often mean sex gets last
priority. So hatch a plot with your partner – book into a hotel for a
'night of sin', away from deadlines and commitments.
Watch erotic films together - this can help you trigger off your own
adventures
Experiment with sexual toys such as vibrators , body oils, and edible
panties ( many of which you can buy online !)
Try sex in the shower ! Not only do you feel clean, wet and smooth in
the bath, water and soap can add magic to your explorations
Try out “kinky” sex. Erotic sex experiments are two-person operations
and "getting ready" leads to anticipation and excitement , so that you
can break through the barriers and allow you to perform beyond your
usual sexual limits.
Liquid paraffin is a safe lubricant to use during “baby making” sex
You can find more suggestions at websites such as
www.sexuality.org
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